All this constant “coronaTION” talk triggered my own plethora of “TIONS” yesterday, one after another. And of course, I shall digress....
REINCARNATION:
Son #2 slamming the laptop frustratingly down onto my bed (perilously close to my slumbering head) while screaming like wild hyenas were attacking him. A.K.A. Introduction to E-learning Lesson 2. 😳
Son #2 slamming the laptop frustratingly down onto my bed (perilously close to my slumbering head) while screaming like wild hyenas were attacking him. A.K.A. Introduction to E-learning Lesson 2. 😳
[WAIT, DIDN’T THIS HAPPEN YESTERDAY??? IS THIS DEJA VOUS???? OMG, AM I TRAPPED IN ONE OF THOSE HORROR FILMS WHERE THE BRUTALLY MURDERED INGENUE IS FORCED TO WAKE UP AND RE-LIVE HER TRAGIC DAY OVER AND OVER AND OVER AD ID INFINITUM?!]
“Mother!!!!! How can this be two tenths???”
[WAIT, yesterday started with, “where does the decimal go??” Phew. False alarm. I’m not a dead movie star ingenue. It’s just Coronacation Day2.]
#samenightmaredifferentday #watchContagion
🙄😬😵😱
#samenightmaredifferentday #watchContagion
🙄😬😵😱
REDEMPTION:
That’s right, people. Redemption. MY redemption. A slam-dunk badge win for my Mother-of-the-Year sash. Because this incredibly awesome, wholly un-Irish SAHM pulled off the surprise of the year: a 9 a.m. Door-Dash delivery of 2 dozen festively decorated St. Patrick’s Day KrispieKremes! 🍀 🍩
Take THAT, Siri. No need to “re-home” Son #1 after all! I mean the mother who intentionally feeds her 3 vulturous spawn diabetes-inducing amounts of refined white sugar for breakfast while everyone’s on strict house arrest must be a saint, no?!
#majorlyepicfail #idiocyatitsfinest #selfsabotage 🤦🏻♀️😱🤯
That’s right, people. Redemption. MY redemption. A slam-dunk badge win for my Mother-of-the-Year sash. Because this incredibly awesome, wholly un-Irish SAHM pulled off the surprise of the year: a 9 a.m. Door-Dash delivery of 2 dozen festively decorated St. Patrick’s Day KrispieKremes! 🍀 🍩
Take THAT, Siri. No need to “re-home” Son #1 after all! I mean the mother who intentionally feeds her 3 vulturous spawn diabetes-inducing amounts of refined white sugar for breakfast while everyone’s on strict house arrest must be a saint, no?!
#majorlyepicfail #idiocyatitsfinest #selfsabotage 🤦🏻♀️😱🤯
CONFRONTATION:
I knew it would happen eventually. The official outbreak of World War III. Right on the NEB Titanic II. That’s right, a big old bomb dropped in our house and boooom! 💣 the walls shook. 💥 And what was the precipitating event for this earth-shattering implosion? What grevious sin was committed?? What inalienable right was violated???
I knew it would happen eventually. The official outbreak of World War III. Right on the NEB Titanic II. That’s right, a big old bomb dropped in our house and boooom! 💣 the walls shook. 💥 And what was the precipitating event for this earth-shattering implosion? What grevious sin was committed?? What inalienable right was violated???
Toothpaste.
Yes, toothpaste.
Apparently I was completely unaware of the standing common law that Princess Sparkle Toothpaste may not be touched/smelled/utilized by anyone other than the designated diva. Thank you, Son #2, for gleefully igniting the sugar-donut-fueled-fuse on the mine of the century. 🔥 Well played, Son #2. Well played. #creativearsonist #instigatorextraordinaire 😏🤭😖 💣💥
CONSPIRATION: (yes that is a real word. Truth.)
In the quest to obtain the coveted St. Patrick’s Day Mom-of-the-Year sash Badge #2, I slaves over a burning hot stove for hours on end to prepare the perfect Irish feast of feasts. Corned beef, cabbage, potatoes, onions & carrots ~ the whole pot of gold.
Yum!!!!! 😁
In the quest to obtain the coveted St. Patrick’s Day Mom-of-the-Year sash Badge #2, I slaves over a burning hot stove for hours on end to prepare the perfect Irish feast of feasts. Corned beef, cabbage, potatoes, onions & carrots ~ the whole pot of gold.
Yum!!!!! 😁
Or least good. 🙂
Maybe ok? 😕
Yes, this is intended for human consumption. 😣
No, I did not buy this at PetSmart. 😡
NO, Do NOT feed your corned beef to the salivating cat under the table. 🤬 🐈😼
#scrambledeggsfor3 #davidenjoyedseconds #werenotirishanyway 🤷🏻♀️🙇🏻♀️💆🏻♀️ 🇬🇷 🇵🇱
CONSTERNATION:
Princess Sparkle Diva (hereinafter “Diva”) picked the movie for the night ~ “Benji”. I’m not gonna lie ~ one of the most emotionally draining movies I’ve seen in ages. Benji, a scrawny, sorry stray dog is befriended by a lonely, fatherless boy who gets abducted with his sister by robbers when the robbers hit the pawnshop where the kids are trying to buy back their dead father’s watch hocked by their mom to make ends meet. 😭😭😭 Tearjerker all around. And TOTALLY plotted by the .
Princess Sparkle Diva (hereinafter “Diva”) picked the movie for the night ~ “Benji”. I’m not gonna lie ~ one of the most emotionally draining movies I’ve seen in ages. Benji, a scrawny, sorry stray dog is befriended by a lonely, fatherless boy who gets abducted with his sister by robbers when the robbers hit the pawnshop where the kids are trying to buy back their dead father’s watch hocked by their mom to make ends meet. 😭😭😭 Tearjerker all around. And TOTALLY plotted by the .
In Minute 5 of the movie, Diva started in, coyly commenting to her adoring Daddy, “oh isn’t Benji soooo cute?!” and “what a sweet doggie!” By the end of the movie, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house ~ and “WE HAVE to get a dog TONITE!!!!” being chanted continuously in a hypnotizingly psychotic rhythm at a decibel that once again en-tranced all the local curs to gather at our front door. That scheming Diva had skillfully laid that trap - and we naively walked right into it. Shame on us. #littleplotter #persistentprincess #deviousdiva 😏🙃😼
REFLECTION:
Every night one of us lays with Lexi while she says her prayers and drifts off to sleep. It’s a long-standing tradition in our house, but not always a welcome one. In fact, there are often fierce arguments about who is Lexi’s “Preferred Parent (PP)”. [Read: it is NOT a coveted Mom-of-the-Year Badge #3]. Why?? This girl can RALLY. And I mean RALLY. All. Night. long. 😵😵😵😴😴😴 🥱🥱🥱😴😴😴😵😵😵
Every night one of us lays with Lexi while she says her prayers and drifts off to sleep. It’s a long-standing tradition in our house, but not always a welcome one. In fact, there are often fierce arguments about who is Lexi’s “Preferred Parent (PP)”. [Read: it is NOT a coveted Mom-of-the-Year Badge #3]. Why?? This girl can RALLY. And I mean RALLY. All. Night. long. 😵😵😵😴😴😴 🥱🥱🥱😴😴😴😵😵😵
But of course, as the day would have it, I Mommy was the designated PP. As I hauled my weary Coronacation-fatted self up the creaking steps of her Princess Pink Sparkle loft bed, I had to literally shake off the physical agitation I felt in annoyed anticipation of the grueling task ahead. 😒😣
But as we got comfy under the covers and turned out the light, my pipsqueak of a daughter turned her little face towards me. “Snuggle??” she inquired wistfully in her sweet Princess Sparkle bubble-gum toothpaste breath.
How could I possibly resist?! 🥰
How could I possibly resist?! 🥰
As my littlest love scooted her perfect mini-body as close to me as humanly possible, she wound her precious little hands around my neck and drew me in so our noses touched like kissing kittens. In the night-light’s subtle glow, my beautiful daughter’s sparkling eyes smiled out at me from with an innocent sincerity that hit my heart to its core.
“YOU are the bestest Mommy in this whole world. I love you, Mama. I love you sooo, sooooo much.” 💕💞
[Heart implodes ❤❤❤❤]
THIS. 💓
So, SO much THIS.💓 💗
THIS ~ an astutely sage reminder from a wide-eyed 5-year-old just trying to make sense of this terrifying world of ours.
THIS ~ what puts it all into perspective, melting away every nerve-rattling, anxiety-triggering, fear-inducing worry and preoccupation.
THIS ~ the reason we will social distance/shelter-in-place/lock-down until 2021 if we have to.
THIS ~ what life is all about.
THIS ~ ALL that matters.
THIS ~ Forever.
THIS ~ what puts it all into perspective, melting away every nerve-rattling, anxiety-triggering, fear-inducing worry and preoccupation.
THIS ~ the reason we will social distance/shelter-in-place/lock-down until 2021 if we have to.
THIS ~ what life is all about.
THIS ~ ALL that matters.
THIS ~ Forever.
THIS = LOVE.❤ ❤️
Comments
Post a Comment